Care Capsule
Capsules of Motivation to Dispense Care and Kindness

Volume 17 - Issue 2
No. 49
June 2014



In This Issue

A Unique Angle for Friendliness

Partnering for a Care Conference in your area

Care and Kindness Conference in New Jersey

Acts of Kindness

New Book from
Dr. Jim Kok

Thoughts from Jim

Light Notes

Prayer Time




A Unique Angle
for Friendliness

(Naming the Elephant)

—— Dr. James R. Kok

Friendliness can live at many levels, all the way from superficial to very deep. At any depth, friendliness is a worthwhile and loving adventure. But one of the challenges in friendship is working to add more depth and meaning to the relationship.

One of the ways to get there is called “Naming the Elephant”.

I stopped at Starbucks recently. After taking my coffee in hand, I turned and looked for a spot to sit. I saw an empty chair at a table with a young woman I knew slightly. I walked over, greeted her, and asked if I could join her. She gave me a smile and a green light to sit down.

Immediately something dawned on me—it was that she had recently gone through a divorce.

“How are you doing?” I asked in an everyday common way that anyone would say.

“Oh, great!” she replied. So much for formalities, I thought, and then with lightening speed pondered whether to go into the divorce or leave that distressing chapter alone.

I decided to reach for the heavy stuff while also realizing she may want to keep the door slammed on that painful chapter. I decided I could not sit and talk without at least trying to touch the pain in her life. So I asked about the divorce and how she was doing with all that.


Dr. James R. Kok has written a definitive resource detailing the key essentials in becoming a more caring person in his latest book, “The Miracle of Kindness” (available on, in either paperback or Kindle edition.) A handful of basic tools —wrapped in courage—are the secret to changing the world through intentional acts of kindness.

As the Koach Of Kare, Dr. Kok was pastor at the Crystal Cathedral for 29 years as head of the Care Ministry department. He is the author of six books and numerous articles, and he is the founder of the Conference on Care and Kindness.

|| Care Capsule Index ||